After spending the last two years writing a book about the perils of ignoring red flags and gut feelings—I just did the same thing. No I didn’t say yes to the wrong guy — but I did say yes to the wrong client. And I knew it was wrong from the beginning!
When a friend of mine asked me to write a brochure for one of his clients, I happily agreed. But as he started to give me the background on the project, the red flags began to fly. The first was that not all of the principals of the firm were on board with the brochure. The second was that I would have to go to a pitch meeting and convince them they needed the brochure. Deep down I already knew this was trouble but my desire for billable hours shut down that little voice in my head and I said yes. Dumb.
So off I went to a “pitch meeting” with all of the principals. I spent a few minutes beforehand with the man who was pushing for the project. He was a super nice guy. Great, I thought. But as he started to explain the situation I felt sick to my stomach. The bottom line was this: two of the five principals were on board, two could be easily convinced, and the rainmaker of the firm was dead-set against it. So guess whose job it was going to be to convince the rainmaker? Mine. (Please keep in mind that I get paid by the hour for writing, not selling.)
The meeting was not pretty. Four of the men were lovely and gracious. They were perfect gentlemen — polite and respectful in every way. But the fifth guy was a complete jackass. He was rude. He had a chip on his shoulder. He was totally opposed to the idea and wasn’t shy about it. And guess who was to target of his ire — me. And remember I was not getting paid for this!
The fun really started when the meeting adjourned. I was going to individually interview each man to review their biographies and discuss their vision of the firm. Again —everyone was a perfect gentlemen — until if was time for you-know-who. It was so bad that one of the guys asked if I wanted him to stick around when I met with the rude one! I told him thanks, but after five years as the only female manager at a beer wholesaler I could handle myself.
I’ll just give you a few highlights:
• He wouldn’t make eye contact
• He spoke in monosyllables
• He told me what a stupid idea it was
• He said that any salesperson who needed a brochure as a sales tool was “a big failure and would hang themselves anyway”
• He told me how much money he had
• He told me he was a “key player” in his industry
• He told me he was the number one salesperson at the company
• And then he finished it off by telling me that his wife didn’t have to work because he made so much money
What an ass. The worse part was that it was my fault for being in this no-win situation. I saw the red flags from the start. My gut feelings said “no” but my mouth said “yes.” I let my desire for billable hours override my intuition.
Last week it all ended badly when my friend informed me that the rainmaker refused to approve the content (which everyone else liked by the way.) Instead, he is going to bring in an expensive ad agency that he selected and completely re brand the firm. I am now fighting to get paid. What a waste of time. What can you learn from my mistake?
• Red flags trigger gut feelings in all aspects of your life—work,family, friends, church and school.
• If anyone asks you to agree to, volunteer for, or commit to something that you are uncomfortable about—say no. Figure out what you are really feeling. What is making you hesitate?
• Remember—it’s not just about recognizing red flags. You must recognize the gut feelings triggered by those red flags
• Pay attention to your feelings and listen carefully for that little voice in your head—it always knows what is best for you!
Every bad boss or difficult client can teach you something. There is always a lesson found in any situation that ends poorly. When did you see the first red flag? How did your gut react? Why did you proceed? The goal is to train yourself to recognize and act on your gut feelings. You never regret it when you act on your gut feelings. You only regret it when you don’t.
P. S. I can’t wait to see the look on the rainmaker’s face when he sees the complimentary copy of “How NOT to Marry the Wrong Guy” I plan on sending his wife! Just kidding. It’s too late for her!
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