Are we right for each other? How do you know?

I was at a holiday party last week and talked to a nice couple about our research and our book. I am distantly related to the female half of the couple. They are both in their thirties, single, successful, and self-described “type A personalities.” (As a type C person, Type A people always fascinate me.) They didn’t tell me how long they had been dating, but they said they have some doubts about their relationship because they can hardly do anything together without getting into an argument. They both like to do things their way. In fact, they admitted to throwing cookie cutters at each other during their recent holiday cookie bake. No matter what it is–a game, a home improvement project, whatever…they both believe that there is only one right way to do something. Unfortunately, they never agree on the right way. Their question to me was this: “What are the top five reasons men or women marry the wrong person?” I told them what we learned in our research…but I don’t think that is what they really wanted to know. I think they really wanted to know whether or not their relationship can be successful in spite of their constant fighting. My gut reaction is that their relationship will be difficult..especially if they throw a few kids into the mix down the road. However, I do think there is a simple way for them to figure this out…but they have to be honest. Here is what they need to ask themselves:
At the end of the day, are you happier with him (or her) or without him?
Do you feel better about yourself when you are together or worse?
Do you feel stressed out when you are with him (or her)?
I know that seems so obvious, but it’s true. Does your boyfriend or girlfriend bring out the best in you? Think about it.